Friday, January 29, 2010

Bummer.

Ugh.

I am so tired and down - just was reminded that I actually don't function like a regular human being. It's fun to pretend and all...

I tapered myself off another 100mgs. Fast taper, I know - maybe I should have waited a week to come down from 1 pill to 3/4 of a pill. I got impatient and lazy about chopping. If I knew it was going to chop the same quantity consistently, perhaps this would be more appealing.

My argument for discontinuing my medication, like most people with chronic medications for the brain, was that it isn't doing anything, it's expensive, provides inconvenient dependence and doesn't make you feel great. I don't have too many side effects, if at any, to complain about except for the fact that I know the pathways in the body that are effected by my drugs now. It's troublesome being dependent - like when I nearly got snowed in in Boston this year and didn't have a weeks worth of pills on me.

I went to a seminar today on natural treatments of women's cancers, came home and started to cook. Quaint, not a lot of stress. But as I tipped my head back to take a drink of my fiber detox concoction, ZAP!

I had brown chunky fiber all over my chest. I stood there in disbelief. I totally forgot about the myoclonis - the very thing I believe my doctor was actually treating. I kind of lumped it together; myoclonis was a step to the mac daddy. It's just a warning sign. As the brown liquid dripped slowly onto the kitchen floor, reality sunk in.

Usually, my myoclonis is subtle with an eerie feeling of wrongness. That means I should get back to bed or whatever and it's usually in the morning. This was entirely night time, not tired, feeling relaxed AND, the biggest part, it was not subtle. What if I spilled all over myself every day? What if I threw my laptop? What if I was driving along??

Sucks.

Maybe it's because:
I pushed the tapering too fast
I had plenty of sugar
I had plenty of coffee
I ate bread (gluten)
I got up early
I used a lot of brain power at the seminar

I... I... well, it wouldn't have happened if I were on my pills the way I have been for years and that I know. I was reminded today that these pills are doing something - even if it feels like I'm completely normal and they're the problem.

:(

So, I'm going to have some rose hip and peony root tea while I do a castor oil pack and think about my next move. I was so excited - a whole list of things, plans, etc. What a reminder.

4 comments:

  1. Hello everyone here, Am Lady bar Patricia Covenupa. from Bronx,New York United States.I want everyone to know how grateful i am after the restoration of my marriage with the help of a spell caster called Dr CHUKWU MADU. He is great and unique,i saw people testifying about Doc.Chukwu and i told him my problems and he cast a love spell that brought my husband back to me after he has cheated and wanted a divorce after 3 years of our marriage. Dr CHUKWU MADU is there to respond to your relationship problems and other human activities like, email him at dr.chukwumaduherbalhome@gmail.com
    Whatsapp Number +2347030936239
    1.Bringing back your ex lover to you. (penis Enrlargment)

    2.Spell to win Lottery ( Herpes CURE Cure all types of disease) 

    3.He cure all types of human diseases. HEPATITIS B

    4.He cast a spell to get a good job with high income.

    5.He cast a pregnacy spell(friutfulness of the worm)

    6.He cast a spell of promotion in your working place.

    7.He cast a spell of protection,
    etc.
    Contact him directly on his active Email address him at dr.chukwumaduherbalhome@gmail.com
    Whatsapp Number +2347030936239

    ReplyDelete
  2. HOW I GOT CURED FROM MY HIV/HPV VIRUS) CURING HERPES IN FEW DAYS.

    I was diagnosed of HSV 1&2 in 2012 and I have tried all possible means to get cured but all to no avail, i used vaccines and oils etc but i was not cured, the symptoms just leave for few weeks and come back again more severe. it continued this way until i saw a post in a health forum about a herbal doctor from West Africa Dr.Chukwu who prepare herbal medicine to cure all kind of diseases including herpes simplex virus. At first i doubted if it was real but decided to give it a try, when i contact this herbal doctor via his email: dr.chukwumaduherbalhome@gmail.com, he prepared a herbal medicine and sent it to me via courier service, when i received this herbal medicine after 4 days, he gave me instructions on how to apply it, when i applied it as instructed, started noticing good changes in me from the first 8 days of applying it and i was cured of this hsv1& 2 within total 3 weeks of usage. I am now free from the virus, i was tested negative. He also told me he cures so many disease like Hepatitis, cancer Influenza, coronary artery, lower respiratory infections,Trachea, bronchus, HIV/AIDS, HPV, Herpes, Kidney failure, Arthritis, Diabetes, Hypertension, Stroke, Obesity, Infertility/Impotency, Cancer, Eye Problem, Skin Problem, Fibroid Tumor, Ulcer, Asthma, , Gonorrhea/Staphylococcus, Candide, contact this doc. Via his direct WhatsApp number +2347030936239. Or mail him. dr.chukwumaduherbalhome@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dr. Chukwu madu herbal home you are a saviour. I am Happy to be writing this article in here, i am here to explore blogs forum about the wonderful and most safe cure for HERPES SIMPLEX VIRUS . I was positive to the deadly Virus called HERPES and i lost hope completely because i was rejected even by my closet friends. i searched online to know and inquire about cure for HERPES and i saw Dr. Chukwu madu testimony online on how he was cured so many persons from Herpes Disease so i decided to contact the great herbalist because i know that nature has the power to heal everything. i contacted him to know how he can help me and he told me never to worry that he will help me with the natural herbs from God! after 2 days of contacting him, he told me that the cure has been ready and he sent it to me via FEDEX or DHL or UPS and it got to me after 4 days! i used the medicine as he instructed me (MORNING and EVENING) and i was cured! its really like a dream but i'm so happy! that's the reason i decided to also add more comment of Him so that more people can be saved just like me! and if you need his help,contact his Email: (dr.chukwumaduherbalhome@gmail.com) you can contact him on mobile number +2347030936239

    He have the herb to cure difference cure for any sickness

    (1) HERPES,

    (2) DIABETES,

    (3) HIV&AIDS,

    (4) URINARY TRACT INFECTION,

    (5) HEPATITIS B,

    (6) IMPOTENCE,

    (7) BARENESS/INFERTILITY

    (8) DIARRHEA

    (9) ASTHMA...

    ReplyDelete
  4. PLEASE READ AND SHARE HERPES CURE

    Am from north Carolina, United state. I caught genital herpes from my ex boyfriend who never had any symptoms of herpes . I had it for 4 years ,and it has affected my life before i got cured. People think herpes is really a minor skin irritation, herpes has a long term effects on health. The stigma attached to this virus by ignorant people is ridiculous. Most people have herpes in one form or another. I would like to advise people on how i got rid of my herpes by using Dr Chukwu Madu herbal medicine. i saw comment posted by a woman from Ireland on internet that she got rid of her herpes and fibroid with the help of doctor Chukwu Madu i was so happy when i saw that post.i quickly collected the doctor's contact email and i email him.  within 2 hr he respond to my email. i explained things to him and he told me not to worried that he will help me. i ordered for his medicine product wish was sent to me via DHL that was how i got the herbal medicine.and i used it as i was told for the period of 12 days .after 2 weeks i found out that the  herpes was no more and this was also confirmed by my doctor.if you have herpes or other similar disease and you want it cure,kindly contact doctor Chukwu Madu via this email dr.chukwumaduherbalhome@gmail.com ( call or whatsapp the Dr +2347030936239.

    ReplyDelete